What's The Worst That Could Happen?

Unfortunately, Nigel picked the wrong day on the bus to take Dr. Abernathy's advice to "actualize" the "latent potential" of his "best possible life." On the plus side, he now had weeks in a full-body cast to focus on finding a new therapist.

Sometimes They Come Bark.

No. No that couldn't be. Old Yeller had been dead when they buried him in the woods. He was sure of it. Dead from a shotgun blast to the head. Oh Jesus. Oh God no!

He Was Still Your Father.

Thank God her mom was in the kitchen when Judy found the photograph buried beneath Dad's things. She couldn't let her mother see him like this. Not right after the funeral.

Jesus... just who the fuck were you, Dad? What kind of sick, perverted lifestyle were you hiding from us all those years?

I'm Saving Up for New Headshots.

Lizette tried her best to smile for the auto show crowd. Tonight, she'd get drunk on mini-bar chardonnay, throw up her dinner, and end up crying on the floor of the motel shower.
Why did demo work always make her feel like such a whore?

Natural Born Eaters.

It wasn't losing the weight she cared about anymore. It was losing the spotlight. Well, nobody cancelled Ruby. And after today, no one would ever forget the name Ruby ever again.

The Day Jennifer Stood Still.

Connelly woke from the same feverish dream, her sheets soaked through with sweat. She caught a glimpse of her cold, emotionless face in the bathroom mirror, broke down, and cried actual tears.

David had been right: Fame was the one Labyrinth she would never escape.

Oh. Yeah. This Is My Friend Kiefer.

Kiefer's stupid fuckin joke hung in the air, but Randy could already tell from the look on the girls' faces that that was the end of that.
God. Why did he still feel obligated to invite him out to the bars?

Safety in the Workplace.

Eventually, Lord Vader caved to the Death Star's Legal Department. He had to admit it really was the only sensible thing to do given the working conditions, but, man...
How much was he NOT looking forward to bringing it up to the Emperor during their 10 o'clock...

Executive Privilege 3: Execute This.

There was a sudden whooooosh at the banquet table and a flash of cold steel.

The President was on his feet before the sound of the senator's insult had even stopped ringing in his ears.

Once again, the Right had underestimated him.  

With the election over, such insolence would not stand.

The Last of America's Deep Space Probes.

As Buck Rogers took his last breath in preparation of certain death, he had to admit... there were worse ways to go.

It's Huge On The East Coast.

As soon as someone shut off the stereo, Garret knew: it just wasn't a dance craze they could get behind.

All Of This Has Happened Before...

In a flash, Betty felt certain she'd been here before, holding this same spoon, stirring this dough. But the things the men had said, about "downloading" and "resurrection," well that-- that was just crazy talk. She knew who she was. She knew what she was ...didn't she?
No, Betty, don't start doubting yourself. Not now.

They're Ready for You in Makeup.

"Hey, look, don't listen to me, sweetheart, okay, I mean, I've only been in the business for, oh, going on thirty-seven years here-- but you better flash some tit if you want to be taken seriously. You think I even got to read for anything in this town before I did that fuckin homo Indie flick? Shit. You need Oscar bait: crackhead, whore, crack-whore, tranny retard... gay, fat, ugly. Take your pick. Do your time. Move on. Now be a doll and fetch me a latte from craft services."

"Have You No Decency?!"

Selling the baby's first-photo rights to US Weekly was one thing, but, goddammit, this was their family home.  This was their private life.  This was France.  And nobody had a right to take pictures of her baby.  NOBODY.

That Final Field Trip.

"All right everybody, last picture, everybody move in a little closer.  ...liiiittle bit closer... ...closer, you guys."  "Oh GOD--"  "--oh GOD, MR. RIGOLETTI?!"  "Mr. Rigoletti!"  "--oh my god OH MY GOD!"  "I think--"  "--what?"  "I think Gates just fell in--"  "--I think she--"  "Gates?"  "--she totally--"  "I think she JUST JUMPED!"  "I don't see her!"  "Gates!"  "OH JESUS CHRIST! Oh god no...!"  "GATES?! GATES!!!"  "oh, god, somebody--!"  "SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING!!!"  "--she just--"  "I know..."  "I couldn't even.  I couldn't stop her."

The Happened.

Forty years had passed, but the townspeople never really forgot the horror that day.  The Day of the Naked Baby Attacks.  No one knew what had triggered the toddlers to swarm, or indeed, where'd they'd even come from.  Or where they'd gone after they fled into the woods.

Maybe some things were better left buried.

Why She Always Showered First.

Donnie told Laurel-Ann he'd be gone all day, parked the car a couple blocks over, and waited outside their bedroom window. He'd been suspicious for weeks. Now he knew.

"You think you know your own wife," he muttered, loading the shotgun. "You think you know the woman you married."

By Your Command.

Sung-joo opened all the boxes, lined them up, and turned them on.  Could it really be that all of his relatives had sent him the exact same birthday present?   He blinked in amazement at how many there were. 

And then they blinked back.

Motel for Dogs.

Scraps knew the University was about to cut his funding due to "gross misconduct."  But he could not allow his Eugenics experiments to be jeopardized.  Not when they were this close to a hybrid.  The time had come for more... unorthodox methods to further the Canine Agenda.

I Finally Found Someone.

Actually-- if Cole was honest with himself-- what had started out as JD and Holly's impromptu little set-up had turned into the greatest blind date of his life.  She was kind, demure, stain-resistant.  The big question now was if his parents could ever really accept her as part of the family.