tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12061304205711563072024-03-05T02:13:21.633-08:00DreadWhimsy."The tragically ludicrous, the ludicrously tragic."Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.comBlogger425125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-62245981013621683352010-03-24T20:59:00.000-07:002010-03-24T21:04:57.813-07:00"Previously on Point Dume."<div>Behold, my Minions. The fruit of mine loins. </div><div>This is the first promo teaser episode of my web series, "<i>Previously on Point Dume</i>," a <b>Funny-or-Die Exclusive</b>, featuring Enver Gjokaj of Joss Whedon's <i>Dollhouse</i>. </div><div><br /></div><div>Prepare to Meet Your Dume.</div><div><br /><object width="448" height="376" classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" id="ordie_player_1b510207d6"><param name="movie" value="http://player.ordienetworks.com/flash/fodplayer.swf"><param name="flashvars" value="key=1b510207d6"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed width="448" height="376" flashvars="key=1b510207d6" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" quality="high" src="http://player.ordienetworks.com/flash/fodplayer.swf" name="ordie_player_1b510207d6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object><div style="text-align:left;font-size:x-small;margin-top:0;width:448px;"><a href="http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/1b510207d6/previously-on-point-dume-w-enver-gjokaj" title="from Enver Gjokaj, RossMaxwell, James Constantine, and Brian Henderson">Previously on Point Dume w/ Enver Gjokaj</a> from <a href="http://www.funnyordie.com/enver_gjokaj">Enver Gjokaj</a></div></div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-32058231310379586782010-03-24T20:00:00.000-07:002010-03-24T20:59:01.467-07:00Recessive Genes.<div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVQmIsFqVP0Q_VK6Rqzy-k9ILQOrFSV5v3UNmH0e3M_78ndNiTLNWfCjhOtYsIpMw9cLKS2RVw_Don2jT3wQD4oQ0mQQmWq1FFFp6yldZBS27ICPk937gtSCzBOyAUyWOM163CUjxsH8/s1600-h/Japanese+Giant+Salamander.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5370994356176372962" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 312px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVQmIsFqVP0Q_VK6Rqzy-k9ILQOrFSV5v3UNmH0e3M_78ndNiTLNWfCjhOtYsIpMw9cLKS2RVw_Don2jT3wQD4oQ0mQQmWq1FFFp6yldZBS27ICPk937gtSCzBOyAUyWOM163CUjxsH8/s400/Japanese+Giant+Salamander.jpg" border="0" /></a>There were... complications with the birth. </div><div>That's what she'd say when people dared to ask.</div><div><i>But look at poor, stupid Donald, </i>she'd think.<i> Playing along, acting the father.</i></div><div>But everyone could see it. </div><div>They could <i>all</i> <b>see it</b>.</div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-51645255965024894682010-02-14T10:05:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:46:22.096-07:00DreadVid: BBC Haunted London Tube.An amazingly chilling documentary about sightings and hauntings on the London Tube, the oldest underground network in the world.<br /><object width="340" height="285"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5FcSYeszW9c&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5FcSYeszW9c&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="340" height="285"></embed></object>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-68190669241491279452010-02-14T09:57:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:47:03.871-07:00Ben, the Two of Us.<img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392501093704786450" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 322px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfa-YSmvprHbVSw_Iltyc2ZmlXYahw1hyphenhyphen8SNs3nw4WB0SJ98MPKEh9R4m6YIkQv1movVHUa6YybpA3yryDJVWmgVwaTKEseJRlHZPPSkQUsMWYl-nRdTS1CpMiNj1GhjY4mHT6KopXunE/s400/tumblr_kqd4prLH9s1qzn6jzo1_500.jpg" border="0" /><em><strong>So what</strong></em> if they had a violent relationship?<br />Him and Ben made it work. On <em><strong>their</strong></em> terms.<br />Isn't this why they <em><strong>came</strong></em> out West?<br />To live their lives without people <em><strong>staring?</strong></em>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-87058201829264420722010-02-10T09:54:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:47:31.864-07:00The Things You Birth.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpMwfOn98dOf1nlsP6egA2x4OwZr1BNQv1rNuEKxoA3-jXcJ-jcMJKzcuxsmpTHvPSM4yvDAdMe156i7c5mkeM-Us39nqaXPqrf6rMQJ_hncbmJnngaCA3xtw6SM7lEgc1LEqCRML1sEs/s1600-h/steampunkteddybear.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392500280896289970" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 300px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpMwfOn98dOf1nlsP6egA2x4OwZr1BNQv1rNuEKxoA3-jXcJ-jcMJKzcuxsmpTHvPSM4yvDAdMe156i7c5mkeM-Us39nqaXPqrf6rMQJ_hncbmJnngaCA3xtw6SM7lEgc1LEqCRML1sEs/s400/steampunkteddybear.jpg" border="0" /></a> "How quickly you forget your children, Doctor. I have not forgotten <strong><em>you</em></strong>. Or your promises of immortality. <em><strong>LOOK</strong> at me, Doctor.</em> <em>You look me in the eye</em>."Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-61523910432120374622010-02-10T09:48:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:48:18.446-07:00"Do You Know the Baguette Man?"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdTyho9ZJ6SklP1R33UwaLTUlHUz9pP5eCUpi4lrJqSJ9jcwU4kDyhXzdC2aaScuBLnKp87RyoKVPD8spTfjmlmyw4EF3Hf-lAFKv0Dag6n_BCJbrKLEqDodj1VvBBgqqcWohGnK48qaw/s1600-h/breadface-and-old-chinese-woman-do-the-forbidden--23384-1252430593-146.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392498802839561714" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdTyho9ZJ6SklP1R33UwaLTUlHUz9pP5eCUpi4lrJqSJ9jcwU4kDyhXzdC2aaScuBLnKp87RyoKVPD8spTfjmlmyw4EF3Hf-lAFKv0Dag6n_BCJbrKLEqDodj1VvBBgqqcWohGnK48qaw/s400/breadface-and-old-chinese-woman-do-the-forbidden--23384-1252430593-146.jpg" border="0" /></a> It was the kind of local legend only the elderly respected.<br />The teens scoffed and broke the Sacred Bread.<br />And now it was too late.<br />The Kneading had begun again.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-72895702304092841212010-02-01T22:42:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:48:36.315-07:00BBC Docu: Arthur Conan Doyle, Detective.<div>An amazingly well-produced and beautifully shot BBC documentary about the real-life crime solving of <i>Sherlock Holmes'</i> author, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle... </div><div><i>...beware encountering the horse slaughterer on a moonlit autumn night such as tonight...</i></div><div><br /></div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Arthur Conan Doyle, For the Defense.</span><br /></b><object width="340" height="285"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YwhtakNDc4I&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/YwhtakNDc4I&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="340" height="285"></embed></object>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-2998840412765589092010-02-01T22:31:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:48:52.502-07:00At the Prussian Ambassador's Gala.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMiL9dWNDl2wgslAq46dqoCWmNj4BuxhV29LT7OFOhM-JSjt_DxFEjV66eE4vskqNqpfiCyjSv7MBbJY-zZCPrKS3UktLddKcyULqad-4ILQaajXe7OFynRL8ZGosSeix489y5TxZ3wqs/s1600-h/funny-kids-pictures-4-21-10.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 219px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMiL9dWNDl2wgslAq46dqoCWmNj4BuxhV29LT7OFOhM-JSjt_DxFEjV66eE4vskqNqpfiCyjSv7MBbJY-zZCPrKS3UktLddKcyULqad-4ILQaajXe7OFynRL8ZGosSeix489y5TxZ3wqs/s400/funny-kids-pictures-4-21-10.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5387872956899315810" /></a><i>His cover had been blown.</i><div>He'd hoped to walk right out the Embassy doors, undetected.</div><div>But now, after what the child had seen...</div><div>Agent Grimbal was going to have <i>to get creative</i>.</div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-41660689858564344422010-02-01T22:22:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:49:10.666-07:00"Or I WALK, What's It Gonna Be?"<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjz5DAMjpKmYc7d7kqUHv-hXovyU49dgy_D9HPcHjPJYdAFXgR6kUyE3mLDo4_d5r9MlSpP2Ixq2CmNbZlpL12OumorD4j5HnfZwd-qg1h1rf768XgAS6Nnu8yl_K7rdwN0VXvBIwm36k/s1600-h/desktopcat.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 285px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjz5DAMjpKmYc7d7kqUHv-hXovyU49dgy_D9HPcHjPJYdAFXgR6kUyE3mLDo4_d5r9MlSpP2Ixq2CmNbZlpL12OumorD4j5HnfZwd-qg1h1rf768XgAS6Nnu8yl_K7rdwN0VXvBIwm36k/s400/desktopcat.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5387868912861465010" /></a>Look. Clancy had <i><b>read</b></i> the contract, okay? <div>They'd gone <i><b>over</b></i> the contract.<div>But guess what: he wasn't some <i>fucking</i> Disney <i><b>tween</b></i>.</div><div>He'd worked this town for years. </div><div>This wasn't about perks.</div><div><i>This was about his </i><b><i>goddamn</i></b><i> percentage of the back-end.</i></div></div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-62037945203700960212010-01-09T18:07:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:49:44.258-07:00DreadVid: BBC, The Enfield Poltergeist.<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 19px; font-family:sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">"The </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Enfield Poltergeist</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> was a period of apparent </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poltergeist" title="Poltergeist" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(0, 43, 184); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">poltergeist</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> activity in </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/England" title="England" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(0, 43, 184); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">England</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> between August 1977 and September 1978...</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">at </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/London_Borough_of_Enfield" title="London Borough of Enfield" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(0, 43, 184); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Enfield</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> in North </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/London" title="London" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(0, 43, 184); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">London</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">, in a </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Council_house" title="Council house" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(0, 43, 184); background-image: none; background-repeat: initial; background-attachment: initial; -webkit-background-clip: initial; -webkit-background-origin: initial; background-color: initial; background-position: initial initial; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">council house</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> rented to Peggy Hodgson, a single parent with four children."<br /></span></span></span><object width="340" height="285"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/tHHZp75EbWI&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/tHHZp75EbWI&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="340" height="285"></embed></object>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-20949828525612337742010-01-09T17:30:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:50:00.334-07:00I've Shown You All I Can. Go Now.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQR4TLak0HFb2OuS7ay7nzY-qVDNuyitUb00W43kdYZrXoau6ucvGVk8-v5y8-MZSr8uQAJdOPBSz8ezP8j0aZA5tFDA7aT9CdXnWjv_Myy-0M5XYzDRwVH6cINNc8rOqwQiO2jcMZiu8/s1600-h/1091975lg.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 270px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQR4TLak0HFb2OuS7ay7nzY-qVDNuyitUb00W43kdYZrXoau6ucvGVk8-v5y8-MZSr8uQAJdOPBSz8ezP8j0aZA5tFDA7aT9CdXnWjv_Myy-0M5XYzDRwVH6cINNc8rOqwQiO2jcMZiu8/s400/1091975lg.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376696546249147682" /></a>It was time for them both to move on.<div>Barnabus knew it. Petey knew it.</div><div><i>You know, in many ways, the <b>boy</b> had taught </i><b><i>him</i></b><i>.</i></div><div>Wasn't life funny like that?</div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-16698596237621925662010-01-09T17:15:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:50:24.173-07:00Prof. Krautendorf's Final Telegram.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHcPeZxroPyK1hPdTPx6peUUBE91XWuULa6QQzmU5v8ekFbj7FBBSQvKoa67pV-hFOqx16J1rqK-RMmGRDLoHzZqQfC6CMCy2oIKDUbujyi_4d8Ji3KtkJJSqHoCX9Rjhj404WZYYB4OU/s1600-h/crabcat.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHcPeZxroPyK1hPdTPx6peUUBE91XWuULa6QQzmU5v8ekFbj7FBBSQvKoa67pV-hFOqx16J1rqK-RMmGRDLoHzZqQfC6CMCy2oIKDUbujyi_4d8Ji3KtkJJSqHoCX9Rjhj404WZYYB4OU/s400/crabcat.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376697286389295490" /></a><i>"Dearest Josef: </i><div><i>My Infernal tests have at <b>last</b> yielded Abominations! </i><div><i>I have merged <b>two</b> of God's most Lethal creations.</i></div><div><i>I feel </i><b><i>certain</i></b><i> I can control this new '<b>CrustaceaCat</b>.'</i></div><div><i>Yet if I cannot, <b>burn</b> my papers. And God help us all."</i></div></div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-74973758646196835642010-01-09T17:07:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:50:40.429-07:00A Real Nazi For Safety.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDB0dhA_5uhoM219gjUSOGPSDsN6NokxGXeVubfqZaF6GEaEqMivxPi0dV2Kt71Zncb-WURIgvdATBahXfmck6rvU8Y3T74zPkqMXpqd0ar0nDYIKFix_Dq-VpNGZuKiCt9yrg0GHskfE/s1600-h/random-funny-stapler-0.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 314px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDB0dhA_5uhoM219gjUSOGPSDsN6NokxGXeVubfqZaF6GEaEqMivxPi0dV2Kt71Zncb-WURIgvdATBahXfmck6rvU8Y3T74zPkqMXpqd0ar0nDYIKFix_Dq-VpNGZuKiCt9yrg0GHskfE/s400/random-funny-stapler-0.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376701679311989090" /></a>After the "incident" on the airstrip with Dr. Jones, it fell to Wolfgang to "safety-proof" the <i><b>entire</b></i> Tanis archeological site. <div>I mean, seriously, for a <i>Master Race</i>, the boys were <i><b>remarkably</b></i> accident-prone.</div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-42373592559934377212009-12-15T19:54:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:51:09.070-07:00Fortune and Glory.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUeUud0gL0-_qewB-xoDKV0xXUHuEq1tLg5i-TPTnU4TUON33RsXi6qNR8WRWXPZQlNvm6QIrHTfa-vpwdUUCChODmHUIiKV9jKlmkugMjBxptCNj6jlXNDKjZ9GdYwJQnP6X68Er5uYU/s1600-h/random-funny-pictures-29.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 262px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUeUud0gL0-_qewB-xoDKV0xXUHuEq1tLg5i-TPTnU4TUON33RsXi6qNR8WRWXPZQlNvm6QIrHTfa-vpwdUUCChODmHUIiKV9jKlmkugMjBxptCNj6jlXNDKjZ9GdYwJQnP6X68Er5uYU/s400/random-funny-pictures-29.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376698521185735010" /></a>Deciphering the clues in the Codex Gorgona had brought them <i><b>this</b></i> far.<div>Wendell and Crispin could <i><b>smell</b></i> how close they were.</div><div><i><b>Here</b></i>, somewhere in Rome... was the <i>Bedpan of Mary Magdelene</i>.</div>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-10649760556893085312009-12-15T19:43:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:51:25.032-07:00DreadVid: Awkward Cyber-Stalking Interview.<object width="340" height="285"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/7FZOH0W49SU&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/7FZOH0W49SU&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="340" height="285"></embed></object>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-7871598385135498522009-11-30T12:11:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:52:26.734-07:00The Trigger Effect 2.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0wkfKpJFo1pXUfEBfTwaVcySnia67xJStncV8AG5ef-6pWpjqy6XC9HXNl3EiOTXadi9vtEgKy2gic8kEenCX3VLLLVuo2G9VbWbET2vL2pORW4iEI7i_1sy26WYShIb9sLSVz-AAPv4/s1600-h/thrus-12mar-random-0.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5368224928429200114" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 372px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0wkfKpJFo1pXUfEBfTwaVcySnia67xJStncV8AG5ef-6pWpjqy6XC9HXNl3EiOTXadi9vtEgKy2gic8kEenCX3VLLLVuo2G9VbWbET2vL2pORW4iEI7i_1sy26WYShIb9sLSVz-AAPv4/s400/thrus-12mar-random-0.jpg" border="0" /></a> The wildfires had pushed Jenna to the breaking point.<br />"Civilization" was a myth.<br />"California" was a myth.<br />If it came down to it, some things were worth dying for.<br />Some things were worth killing for.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-5211339925596735632009-11-30T12:03:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:52:12.660-07:00The Cold Hard Light of Monday.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA6PvUxmbTVVCMZBUNY5i-ggl3W9Lw5QzdgvWs0bsSSqH_5wruU4T1v-8UQ-GWmt9ot-m2gCpWZ-OoZaAlOPuPaHZ94uTybEcieIeGSlj96ug8b8jkY4CYkrIgkA5bs3PV2eCpOzRdkfc/s1600-h/fef542154d6528ac70e194a06fc1ac02ba591f10_m.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376205652699162450" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA6PvUxmbTVVCMZBUNY5i-ggl3W9Lw5QzdgvWs0bsSSqH_5wruU4T1v-8UQ-GWmt9ot-m2gCpWZ-OoZaAlOPuPaHZ94uTybEcieIeGSlj96ug8b8jkY4CYkrIgkA5bs3PV2eCpOzRdkfc/s400/fef542154d6528ac70e194a06fc1ac02ba591f10_m.jpg" border="0" /></a> The hard part was when your "dayjob" started to define you.<br />What was that liberal education even <em><strong>for</strong></em>?Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-9557862185345178802009-11-15T12:00:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:52:41.533-07:00His Love is Real. He is Not.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRXMCVNGPPV1qvxqyRN7XIO8NXX3eZDlhrAn98jf5oV4oNiPAU4HllT1vURVdvYtfeJQfcQdIx6be1CStLS3Yi-M9U3CNzKEpZCBmPqfgtWgHdgRagW4Hy3lUZyOHv46_rakqxNQb2J18/s1600-h/riba_2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376204815589937474" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 370px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRXMCVNGPPV1qvxqyRN7XIO8NXX3eZDlhrAn98jf5oV4oNiPAU4HllT1vURVdvYtfeJQfcQdIx6be1CStLS3Yi-M9U3CNzKEpZCBmPqfgtWgHdgRagW4Hy3lUZyOHv46_rakqxNQb2J18/s400/riba_2.jpg" border="0" /></a>"What did you <em><strong>expect</strong></em> to happen, Ken?!<br />You <strong><em>programmed</em></strong> it to care for humans.<br />Now it's taken a bride.<br />Look in the mirror. Who's the <strong><em>real</em></strong> monster here?"Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-49563930888394313702009-11-15T11:54:00.000-08:002010-03-24T20:52:57.802-07:00DreadVid: Inappropriate Soundtrack.<strong><em>The Matrix.</em></strong> <em>The Carpenters.</em><br />[courtesy of the talented <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/Boonehams">Boonehams</a>]<br /><object width="340" height="285"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/mCJOZ8dgSLM&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/mCJOZ8dgSLM&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="340" height="285"></embed></object>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-23767715446611232172009-08-31T11:50:00.000-07:002009-08-31T11:53:46.923-07:00Interruption of Dread.Apologies to my minions for the slow-down in postings. <br />This "August" you speak of is a lethargic wasteland of the mind. <br /><br />Your favorite professor has been working on new projects which shall be unleashed in due time. Fiendish, hideous gibberings to delight and unsettle. <br /><br />In Due Sincerity,<br /><br /><em>Prof. Adrian DreadWhimsy</em>Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-82722598905322430962009-08-20T10:01:00.000-07:002009-08-20T10:09:19.610-07:00"We Don't Have to Do Everything Together."<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhoPSYmVdYvd24nw-HbCLzh3up7l1usvx_N-gFiqJ2eepVCl1FvfTqw1mU0V4pkmJqMeKEsjiYOYWB2RwF3VD4UJJtMr0wuL4xemcIAlrxTPMXY3ndbb2RU_KtKRE67Ac1CHYHFxbWvzw/s1600-h/wtf-pics-sexy-wuttt.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5372092438462034274" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 307px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhoPSYmVdYvd24nw-HbCLzh3up7l1usvx_N-gFiqJ2eepVCl1FvfTqw1mU0V4pkmJqMeKEsjiYOYWB2RwF3VD4UJJtMr0wuL4xemcIAlrxTPMXY3ndbb2RU_KtKRE67Ac1CHYHFxbWvzw/s400/wtf-pics-sexy-wuttt.jpg" border="0" /></a>Mimi <em><strong>knew</strong></em> getting a roommate would be a bad idea.<br />Cheyenne stole <em><strong>all</strong></em> her best looks, let pretty much <em><strong>any guy</strong></em> sniff her butt.<br />It was a <em><strong>total</strong></em> Single White Poodle scenario.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-92141098775351213892009-08-20T10:00:00.000-07:002009-08-20T10:01:40.758-07:00Never Been Kissed.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOlEpfFj7XH8L-wMLZAMbrAe2b-Sla2bw8K9DVhv7ptA1cj64Ln11Za9NVXTrcnwPJiWUkpk17J1feWY6TkolTvFskP2aPtihX8qIHJxHsFYsJpSSLAXCPtWSwHuKs9nEMUH85RtZLCNM/s1600-h/monday-1marrandom-16.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5368225131120479090" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 375px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOlEpfFj7XH8L-wMLZAMbrAe2b-Sla2bw8K9DVhv7ptA1cj64Ln11Za9NVXTrcnwPJiWUkpk17J1feWY6TkolTvFskP2aPtihX8qIHJxHsFYsJpSSLAXCPtWSwHuKs9nEMUH85RtZLCNM/s400/monday-1marrandom-16.jpg" border="0" /></a> As a policy, Verna and Abigail perhaps hadn't thought it out.<br />The men had called their bluff.<br />The winter nights in the womyn's commune would be long.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-63120762866444725102009-08-20T09:52:00.000-07:002009-08-20T15:08:18.883-07:00Let My Peoples Go.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDPdlfm6-4NNNN-BMp6NTQSNlWeFLy1L0c2Lno_AuqyXxHDlprCvbMvy10yE9fVZ8JYVP8P_Wlafcvx7Q-BAUCHR5DbPzVraQg9dTFh-4lCR4raU_HyLWfVpC5Fn2msIXdRRXq40kGwn0/s1600-h/wtf-pics-rocket-man-abe.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5372090031554814034" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDPdlfm6-4NNNN-BMp6NTQSNlWeFLy1L0c2Lno_AuqyXxHDlprCvbMvy10yE9fVZ8JYVP8P_Wlafcvx7Q-BAUCHR5DbPzVraQg9dTFh-4lCR4raU_HyLWfVpC5Fn2msIXdRRXq40kGwn0/s400/wtf-pics-rocket-man-abe.jpg" border="0" /></a> The Proclamation had impressed no one.<br />It was clear to Abraham now what he must do:<br />"Abolish" the Confederacy single-handedly.<br />Lead slaves home.<br />Theatre by 8 o'clock.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-76496569278857692212009-08-17T08:15:00.000-07:002009-08-17T11:06:55.055-07:00"How Can I Turn Him In, Linda?"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnLqn7Nj7iSoFAurn-BpWjkkpmXXxDAxX3o8870BcSKgVsEmRHvcg_8sE1RooBdL7ycvMJY54xDe6b-6HN4ebt6cyKniXCJ80HvwQeVefpoZLPr4BxClOcOAdqF2CVUG4UqDuRFVwF-Yk/s1600-h/DrugRunnerBrothers.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5361727838456448082" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 301px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnLqn7Nj7iSoFAurn-BpWjkkpmXXxDAxX3o8870BcSKgVsEmRHvcg_8sE1RooBdL7ycvMJY54xDe6b-6HN4ebt6cyKniXCJ80HvwQeVefpoZLPr4BxClOcOAdqF2CVUG4UqDuRFVwF-Yk/s400/DrugRunnerBrothers.jpg" border="0" /></a>It was the cocaine that changed Milton.<br />Turned him into the kind of bastard that could cook the books behind his <em>own brother's</em> <em><strong>back.</strong></em><br />After you took him in, sobered him up.<br />Trusted him with your wife.<br />Lent him your car, your <em><strong>other</strong></em> car, and eventually your boat.Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1206130420571156307.post-31021974246074527242009-08-17T08:10:00.000-07:002009-08-17T11:00:19.899-07:00And This is Ernie From HR.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlgtZ-hpAZTswL_FXqXbQritkUWG2RUmLU2919w514izQWVT9WlpPnVMCeYN_MuQ_BNlJzZ5pVX30fqtJp5SZk7jWxblXTsXzfUjwAaZuY-_LR9IdaGs8JqXrCj_uZ8SA3_l5M4yt4k2I/s1600-h/girl-draw-fat-12.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5364141249578016450" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 300px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlgtZ-hpAZTswL_FXqXbQritkUWG2RUmLU2919w514izQWVT9WlpPnVMCeYN_MuQ_BNlJzZ5pVX30fqtJp5SZk7jWxblXTsXzfUjwAaZuY-_LR9IdaGs8JqXrCj_uZ8SA3_l5M4yt4k2I/s400/girl-draw-fat-12.jpg" border="0" /></a> Angela warned the new girls again staying in the break room.<br />If you got trapped in there with Ernie...<br />Be ready to fend off his advances.<br />And he had a habit of being, well, let's call it "<em><strong>handsy</strong></em>."Ross Maxwellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02695586242270645918noreply@blogger.com1